Adjusting to the ‘New Normal’

Here we are, nearly four months into the pandemic. The whole thing has been a very strange experience, for all us. It’s been a shared experience across the planet, though some countries have managed it better than others. I’m learning that the ability to adapt is so important.

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Addiction is Like (a poem)

Addiction is like an old record skipping,

caught in a permanent loop,

but you can’t stop the needle,

because you’re handcuffed to the radiator

and your hand is sore and bleeding from

trying to break free –

so you keep pulling until you realize

you can only accept the skipping sound

and once you do that, it’s like

you don’t even hear it.

(Photo by Steve Harvey on Unsplash)

Pride: My Biggest Character Defect

During the years I’ve been in recovery, I’ve learned alternative definitions to many common words. Take “pride” for example. In most cases, it’s deemed good to be proud of one’s self. In recovery and religious terms, though, pride is seen as one of the biggest sins or “character defects.”

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On Anxiety and Choosing Faith over Fear

Rachel has told me many times before of her struggles with anxiety. When I listened to her, I used to not be able to understand it. I’ve always thought of myself as a fairly calm person, and I can remember many moments from over the past several years where I’ve felt very peaceful.

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Happy Father’s Day!

Today is a sad day for me, but I’m also feeling hopeful. This marks the second Father’s Day since my dad passed away. In fact, tomorrow will mark the second anniversary of the day he passed. My life irrevocably changed that day on June 22, 2018, but I feel that my grief journey has gotten lighter.

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The Hate Inside of Me (a poem)

I only wanted love from you, but loving you was pain –

the laughter one day, followed by grief and terror

from whatever state you happened to be in.

I ask myself, “Who were you?”

You discarded me like an object and

closed off that side of yourself

that seemed to contain the Devil.

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You Owe it to Your Future Self

I began using self-affirmations a few years ago. I write them down on little index cards and keep them posted in my room as reminders. My thoughts tend to turn toward the negatives, and the self-affirmations help. One of my favorites, which has become a mantra, is, “You owe it to your future self.”

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