Free will must be an illusion
None of us are running the show
I spend my days in utter confusion
My instinctual drives I don’t know
What is destiny? What is fate?
Are these things superstitions?
Let’s gather and have the debate
I’ve always had my suspicions
I believe the subconscious deep within
Has more say than we like to believe
And many of our decisions hinge
On things we cannot perceive
I got lost in the demented wonderland
Fell down the rabbit hole of nothingness
I must admit it is a rugged land
Easy to find if you have the willingness
The mad-hatter gave me LSD to take
And I had the worst trip of my life
I was covered with crawling kingsnakes
For a moment, I thought I had died
The angel of death sits by my bedside
I stare into the vacuum of her eyes
I know for sure I’m being exiled
And she’s waiting for my demise
She comes to visit once a month
Brings me a bouquet of dead flowers
She always looks so stunned
That I’m awake at such late hours
What is this beast that rises from the sludge?
My friend thinks it’s quite amazing
It’s obvious that I have misjudged
The beast’s insatiable cravings
It has swallowed my family whole
In one terrifying gulp
Now it will not let up control
Our insanity is the result
My skull is packed with worms
They slither and they squirm
But let’s be serious now
Let’s scamper in the streets and prowl
When the machines fell from the sky
I got a burning sensation in my eyes
The satellites crashed through our roof
And the pain of living was quite acute
The preacher told me God was dead
He’d supervised the killing himself
Then he stood up and declared
He was moving to a different realm
I’m still searching for God
But have I found Him?
When I pray, He doesn’t respond
So, I sing murder ballads and hymns
God is in the stars
He’s in the grocery store, too
In the face of an old man
In a sunset that’s so true
Really, you can find God anywhere
If you look in the right places
Perhaps She’s in the very air
And in the in-between spaces
The feeling in my bones tells me
Apocalyptic nightmares are coming:
Auburn skies and terrible screams
The human race succumbing
To forces of their wicked natures
But why do I fear this so much?
And why have I fallen for these traps?
Why does my mind always go dark?
Why can’t I just relax?
Down South, billboards told me to REPENT
Along the sides of lonely highways and in between
Rancid truck stops that scared me
I once wanted total control, until that day
Everything spun in a mad frenzy, and I lost my grip
On sanity – leaving me locked away
Without a say on anything and everything
Yes, this has happened many times before
And the illusion of control always surges back
I try to ignore that monster in my head
To restore my equilibrium
To reach a place that’s solid, that has a foundation
That doesn’t constantly crack
But maybe that last madness was too much
And it knocked me to the ground for good
Maybe I’ve truly lost touch
With a reality that’s wholesome and good
Religion is a system of cruelty
And the priests are the executioners
The church can no longer fool me
Of the terrible abuse that occurs
Let’s go beyond good and evil
Into the gray mist of the unknown
Leaving behind the crosses and medieval morality
That have provided comfort for so long
This priest towers over me; a blazing fury in his eyes
He foams at the mouth and tells me
He’s the Devil in disguise
Trust me, I do believe him – in the darkness of the confessional
His tales of deceit are utterly credible
And his wizened face is ancient and contemptible
