Sadness is a river
Flowing backwards, black as the night
Fashioned with a soaking ecstasy in winter
Flooding the town with its melancholy
Laid wide with a luminous drive
Flashed through minds with a burst
Black was the river with a yellow call
Shone was a landscape in this darkness
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It’s a numb feeling
Something hollow
When you know there’s no hope for the country
No chance for a better tomorrow
What will we do?
I’m not quite sure
What will happen next?
Only God knows for sure
Inside your spring blossom
The heart is locked away
Caged up like the songbird
Inside these insidious walls
That far-away gaze tells me
So much about your broken spirit
The night you swallowed the pills
The screaming and crying
Depression is a liar
It tells me nasty things
These negative thoughts I acquire
And the despair it brings
But my friends always say
This too shall pass
Though it’s wretched today
I faintly see a half-full glass
When I feel disconnected
Not much seems to help
I’m not sure what I expected
Or when it will stop
Music is my healing balm
And so is my writing
They help me stay calm
With the negativity I’m fighting
I. Relativity
Have you noticed?
The homeless population is increasing
In the LA tent encampments
Surrounded by luxury cars
They plan to change the world
They are our only hope
At night, they bake beans over trash-can fires
Tell stories of their downfalls
And imaginary triumphs
Then they cuddle up in their tents
And scream into the void
They are met with silence
During winters of discontent
It’s imperative to remember
That I’m not a malcontent
And all I must do is surrender
Surrender to the sky and the sea
And throw my body in the ocean
The water washes over me
The salty air is like a potion
There was a time in my life
When I was in a straight-jacket
And I left the hospital foaming at the mouth
And was met with intolerable colors
I once wanted total control, until that day
Everything spun in a mad frenzy, and I lost my grip
On sanity – leaving me locked away
Without a say on anything and everything
Yes, this has happened many times before
And the illusion of control always surges back
I try to ignore that monster in my head
To restore my equilibrium
To reach a place that’s solid, that has a foundation
That doesn’t constantly crack
But maybe that last madness was too much
And it knocked me to the ground for good
Maybe I’ve truly lost touch
With a reality that’s wholesome and good
Chance at redemption
Every day, new journeys
But desire is gone
Replaced by resignation
Life as drab with no color
But must I confess how I liked him
Though he pointed the gun at my head
And told me to give up the charade
Of pretending to enjoy this life
He was tall, slender like
The Slender Man, gruff like
People your mother told you
Not to associate with – scoundrels
“It is very hard to explain to people who have never known serious depression or anxiety the sheer continuous intensity of it. There is no off switch.” — Matt Haig
Continue reading “Daily Quote: There’s No Off Switch for Depression”
