Spirit and Flesh (a poem)

This gothic cathedral was once a spiritual home.

Priests dabbed foreheads with holy water and

incense wafted to high ceilings and

parishioners chewed on wafers and said:

“Peace be with you.”

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Far from God (a poem)

I must get off this path of sin, and find my

inner-being in God, but I do not know how.

I pray, but I no longer feel the consolation

I once felt – that wholeness and joy, like I was

being held tightly in His arms.

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Pride: My Biggest Character Defect

During the years I’ve been in recovery, I’ve learned alternative definitions to many common words. Take “pride” for example. In most cases, it’s deemed good to be proud of one’s self. In recovery and religious terms, though, pride is seen as one of the biggest sins or “character defects.”

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On Anxiety and Choosing Faith over Fear

Rachel has told me many times before of her struggles with anxiety. When I listened to her, I used to not be able to understand it. I’ve always thought of myself as a fairly calm person, and I can remember many moments from over the past several years where I’ve felt very peaceful.

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What Heaven Looks Like (a poem)

You forget there are places like this:

A quiet bay with still water and a wide expanse,

the sun shining in a cloudless blue sky, and

seagulls calling overhead.

From the sandy shore, you watch the old man

cast a fishing net and the teenagers lounging

with headphones on.

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Love is a Type of Water

As a child, at least as a child growing up heavily in church as I did, you are taught to memorize verse after verse. I remember most of the verses, even if it’s not word-for-word and the exact location. I can hold my own in an intellectual, biblical conversation. Its one of the things I’m most proud of about myself.

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Pray for You

Prayer has always been a major part of my life. I remember kneeling next to my bed as a little girl to pray. I even loved when I was old enough to lead my family in our dinner prayers, which sometimes felt like a sermon because I got lost on tangents and just love talking (even to God)!

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Complicated Love

I’ve got a thing for love.  I love love. And love, the love that is real, typically seems to be complicated.

If you ask me what book I’d want if I could only ever have one book for the rest of my life?  It would probably be Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen. If I could only watch one movie for the rest of my life? You’ve Got Mail.  Both of these speak to my heart in a way that not much else does.

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The Light that Always Shines (a poem)

For Mick Dolan

Just when you think you’re going to collapse,

and get swallowed into the abyss:

You fall into God’s arms.

When you think life is too much,

and you’re surrounded by darkness,

and the world becomes small,

God enlarges it.

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