I was diagnosed with Bipolar I in college. After a clear manic episode while going to Temple University, a psychiatrist working on the campus prescribed me a mood stabilizer, along with the depression and anti-anxiety medications I was already taking.
Dark Night, cold Breeze From the circling fan above. There is no sound, Yet that of thunderstorms. Pressure on my feet And slight movement all around. However life seems still, When the thunderous rasp of breath Is not to my right. Sheep and stars do not help, The darkness only reminds me I am alone.
You asked me what I wanted
I said friendship and honesty
I still love you and will always love you
Our connection was deep and passionate
It was full of love and spiritual discussions
You made me feel stronger
Stronger than I’ve been in a long time
I’m angry and I’m upset. The past few days I’ve sunk into a depression, mixed with bursts of anger. A lot of it has to do with self-isolation. Some of it has to do with bipolar symptoms. However, a lot of it has to do with what’s going on in America right now.
If you’ve visited my blog before, you may recognize this picture. I took it in late 2018 during a little adventure Rachel and I took in the Old City neighborhood of Philadelphia. It’s one of my favorite photos that I’ve taken from the past few years.
I’ve been listening to more movie soundtracks lately while I’m writing and researching my podcast/novel project. I came across one song from the soundtrack to a science fiction/horror film that I absolutely love.
I’ve always loved photos of the moon hanging over the sea at night, so I decided to draw my own depiction last year. Like I mentioned in a previous post about drawing, the process has been very soothing for me.
“Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.” – attributed to Albert Camus. Camus is one of my favorite writers and philosophers, and I agree with this quote wholeheartedly. I don’t try to be weird or different on purpose – I simply try to follow my heart.